Sunday Funnies - Jeremy Roenick Edition

This season I am going to introduce a new feature here at Greatest Hockey Legends.com - Sunday Funnies. Hockey history should be taken seriously, but on Sunday's we are going to let loose and enjoy ourselves.

Here's a little sneak peek at what we can expect to see with Sunday Funnies. With Jeremy Roenick announcing his retirement last week, we have the perfect starting point for our ice follies.

Roenick The Dancing Machine

Now that Jeremy Roenick is retired, he will find he has a lot of spare time on his hands. I do not think anyone will be surprised when Jeremy Roenick appears on Dancing With The Stars. Even during games he all he wanted to do was boogie:



Ah, good ol' JR!

Well, dancing will probably bring him a better income than royalties from his Celebriduck. What the hell is this?!


It definitely appears he needs some extra cash. Here he is after his retirement press conference, trying to scrounge up enough money for a cheeseburger and a malt:


Maybe all this dancing and singing is all a ruse. Maybe he's trying to make us believe he is just an ordinary guy, so that no one suspects him as he embarks on a new life of fighting crime:


Rumor has it his Philly Phantom seen here is actually Brian Propp.

Two Minutes For Quipping

Here's some great quotes by and/or about Jeremy Roenick:

• When asked why his team was better on the road than at home, he said, "Because wives and girlfriends aren't on the road." He must have realized he was going to take some heat for that one, because he retracted his statement just a little bit. "All of our wives and girlfriends are wonderful people. They're wonderful people. They just have to know to leave their guys alone on game days. No grocery shopping. No cleaning up the house. Just let 'em sleep and get their rest."
• On hockey player's teeth: "Until I lost mine, I never realized how awesome teeth are."
• On the Canadian media: "They just love to complain about me because I'm an American who gets more press than their Canadian players."
• On a critical Garth Snow: "If going to college gets you a career backup goaltender job, and my route gets you a thousand points and a thousand games, and compare the two contracts, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out whose decision was better."
• The famous Patrick Roy debate: "I liked Patrick's quote, (that) he would have stopped me. I wanted to know where he was in Game 3. He was probably getting his jock out of the rafters of the United Center." — On Patrick Roy after Game 4 of the conference semifinal between Chicago and Colorado in 1996. Roy's reply: "I can't really hear what Jeremy says, because I've got my two Stanley Cup rings plugging my ears."